#also i totally forgot about that dp post i made

[everestentertainments]

I posted 800 times in 2021

50 posts created (6%)

750 posts reblogged (94%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 15.0 posts.

I added 713 tags in 2021

#undertale - 155 posts

#ffxv - 133 posts

#gif - 71 posts

#the mountain speaks - 63 posts

#deltarune - 57 posts

#video - 53 posts

#random - 49 posts

#sw - 46 posts

#chocobros - 44 posts

#dp - 42 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#my older and little brother @ me during my high school anime phase: haha lol you like anime? cringe. we don't care about your interests.

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

“Why do you ship Soriel” simple really, i think Sans the Skeleton would be into milfs next question

139 notes • Posted 2021-11-28 02:06:12 GMT

#4

The camera mechanic in FFXV is sooooo unfair because there i was crying my eyes out while Florence Welch punched me in the gut with a cover of one of my favorite songs and the game pulled off this amazing thematic callback, MEANWHILE what’s actually onscreen is just *five horrible selfies in a row* *Gladio’s ass* *the picture of the special cup noodles we made* *the boys posing* *Noct looking ridiculous* *more horrible selfies* *another picture of Gladio’s ass*

166 notes • Posted 2021-07-05 00:32:45 GMT

#3

Along with being the biggest sign of their arrogance, it is so funny to me how much the gods in Kid Icarus: Uprising mock and belittle Pit considering how he’s the character routinely going up against entire armies, legendary monsters, and the gods themselves. There isn’t a powerful character in this game he hasn’t shot at. If you’re an immortal being in the Kid Icarus universe you really gotta watch yourself because if you step outta line there’s a chance the local “good” goddess will sic her best child soldier on you, and oh buddy you are in for a TIME. This baby faced literal angel will break into your house, knock over your things, and then beat the shit out of you with a weapon taller than him, all while spouting terrible one-liners and eating food off the floor. Kid Icarus Hades threw hands with a 14 year old and LOST.

309 notes • Posted 2021-10-12 00:11:27 GMT

#2

Was discussing Danny Phantom aus and phanon with a friend of mine and after I got done explaining Ghost King Danny to her she just goes

”AU where that red headed kid you told me about becomes ghost king”

“??? Wes??”

“Yeah the one the fans made up”

“But he’s not a ghost.”

“So?”

And like idk what else to do with this take but post it here.

315 notes • Posted 2021-06-10 02:07:27 GMT

#1

Thinking about how funny Cor Leonis is like you meet him and he’s just some chill gruff older dude and he expositions to you to get the game rly going then you don’t really see much for the rest of the game. Then ya read his dossier and talk to him in Ep Gladio and it turns out he was just the angriest dude in the world when he was younger. Just a tiny ball of rage. This fifteen year old has a huge sword and will fight anything and everything that moves. He called his own prince a bitch to his face and Regis just invited him to be on his personal guard. Lucis uncovered the deep cave that housed the immortal ancestor who started the Amicitia line and he fucking picked a fight with them. The theory/headcanon that he was the one who rescued Prompto from the lab adds to his character so much because it IS in character. What other character in this game would go on a recon mission and come back with a whole ass baby. I love Cor Leonis.

918 notes • Posted 2021-04-08 05:55:40 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[new-revenant]

DP/DC Week Day 2 - Mistaken Identity

This is built off of my last post for yesterday’s prompt, in which Danny is on the run from the GIW and came to Gotham for what he assumed was a small amount of time. Unfortunately, he sensed the Pit in the Batcave and now he’s sorta mostly alive now. And the Red Hood thinks he’s his clone.

“I swear I’m not a clone Mister Red Hood,” Danny pleaded. He had been saying the same thing for a few minutes now, and Red Hood still didn’t believe him.

“Oh yeah, how did you know how to get here then?” RH questioned.

“I dunno! I uh, sensed this weird…thing-I think it was this funky pit-and jumped in it. Yeah.”

“First of all, that sounds stupid.”

“Well I’m stupid.”

“Second of all, you still didn’t answer my question. Third of all, why are you wearing…whatever you’re wearing. It looks like you came freshly from whatever test tube made you.”

Danny looked down at his outfit. “Yeah you have a point there. And I uh, I was a ghost that died in a um…horrific electrical accident and this pit brought me back to life.”

“Sure you did. Now-“ Jason pulled out his gun, “-Tell me how you got here, or you’ll be a ghost long before the Bats get back.”

Well Danny was in a pickle. So he decided that he would just say the first thing that came to mind, since it worked so well the first time.

“I’m on the run from the government so I found this natural portal and it dumped me out here.”

“…The hell is a “natural” portal?”

“They appear whenever there’s an excess amount of ambient ectoplasm concentrated in a small area.”

“Okay, that makes sense. I think.” RH said as he finally put his gun away, “Well then mini-me, wanna steal the tires from the Batmobile?”

“Fuck yeah I do.”

“That’s my clone!”

“Don’t call me that.”

——

Tim was tired. Him, Batman, Robin, and Orphan had to leave in a hurry to stop the sudden appearance of Gentleman Ghost showing up and teaming up with Bane of all villains. GG managed to give him something akin to Venom in appearance, but was apparently much safer for Bane, and for more dangerous to everyone else who had to fight Bane. Almost had to call the league for help.

Not to mention the Batmobile just decided to not work so they had to grapple and run over to where they were. Probably GG’s doing or something.

Speaking of Batmobile, when they all returned to the Batcave, they noticed that all of it’s tires was gone. And they all knew who would steal the bat-tires.

“Jason,” Tim groaned as the group headed to the Batcomputer. Jason was leaning on it, helmet off, looking as smug as ever. Next to him was the four tires all stacked on top of each other.

“Heya Timbo. Heya B. Child. Hey Cass,” Jason smirked, “You know I just couldn’t resist taking the bat-tires.”

“Jason,” Batman glared at him, “Did you come here for a reason other than stealing the tires?”

“Tt. Knowing Todd, probably not,” Damian sneered.

“Kid’s right, I just wanted to steal the tires.”

The others sighed. Cass went over to collect the tires, but before she could grab one, someone jumped out of the stack.

“Hello!” The person-who was definitely at least a young teen-shouted. The Bats readied up to attack this intruder, before Jason bursted out into laughter.

“C-come on kid, was ‘hello’ the best you got? I thought we decided on saying ‘boo’ or something like that.”

“My mind blanked okay? How about you go kick your teeth in?” The intruder said.

Looking closer, it was obvious to see a connection between Jason and the child.

“Did you get cloned?!” Tim questioned. “How-why-Is this why you came?”

The two skunk-haired trouble makers looked at each other.

“Sure.”

“Totally.”

“Who cloned you?” Batman asked.

“The government.”

Damian also had a good question, “Todd, why would you bring a clone of you into the Batcave?”

“Oh, he didn’t bring me, I went through a portal and climbed out of that green pit over there,” the kid said.

“The Lazarus Pit, you mean,” Batman said.

“I forgot we had that,” Tim muttered.

“Yeah, so apparently ambient ectoplasm or whatever can like, condensed in one place and create a portal, or something, I don’t fucking know ask him,” Jason jutted his thumb over to the kid. The others looked at him expectingly.

“So…have you ever heard of the GIW?” The kid asked, “They wear white suits and stop people from learning about the existence of ghosts?”

Tim instantly went over to the Batcomputer to look for information about the GIW.

“Tell us more,” Batman requested.

“Well their like, this secret government group that experiments on ghost and they thought the uh, pits had something to do with ectoplasm. Including this guy-“ he pointed to Jason, “-he’s obviously some sort of undead to anyone with enough knowledge of ectoplasmic life forms-yes I know that sounds like an oxymoron fuck you-so you can probably connect the dots from there if your as smart as people say you are B.”

Tim stopped his search for a moment to look over at the clone. He had a similar smug look to Jason, but something was off. Something about him was…unnatural? Uncanny? Whatever it was, Tim wanted to look away from him and never look back.

Focusing back on his search, nothing was coming up for the GIW. Batman and Damian joined him, while Cass helped the kid get out of the tire stack.

“So, or we going to call the kid mini-Jason or?” Tim asked, bring quickly cut off by said kid.

“Call me mini again and I’ll bite you. Also, is it true that when Batman first met Jason he was stealing the Batmoblie’s tires? Cause that funny if it is true.”

“It true,” Batman answered.

“That’s cool-also can I have one of those batarangs? They seem-“

“No.”

“Can I have-“

“No.”

“Aw come on! You didn’t even let me finish my sentence.”

“Ah don’t worry kid, I get you one of those batarangs,” Jason patted him on the back. The kid eyes lit up in excitement.

“Really?”

“No,” everyone-sans Jason and Cass-said at once.

“Aw man.“

Batman pulled away from the computer, “I’m going to contact all the magic users I can. The rest of you-keep the child away from anything important. We don’t know if he could be a spy, or a sleeper agent. Robin, inform me if any attacks occur in Gotham. Orphan, inform the rest about the clone. Red Robin.”

“Yes sir?” He looked over at Batman and desperately tried to not make eye contact with the clone.

“Try to get as much information out of him as possible.”

“What about me? He’s my clone after all,” Jason complained.

“Find him some clothes-and make sure he eats. Goodbye.”

Then he left, with Damian going out to patrol and Cass going out to inform the others. That left Tim, Jason, and Jason’s clone in the Batcave.

“So, I don’t think we settled on this earlier, but what do we call you?” Tim asked the clone. He looked around, as if trying to come up with something based on his surroundings. Finally, he came up with an answer.

“Call me James.”

“Was James really the best name you could come up with?” Jason remarked.

“Was there really a need to be so rude about it?”

And the two started arguing. Tim would love nothing more than to take a nap right now. Alas, he would just have to drink 17 more cups of coffee to deal with this nonsense.

[chvrliesapcet]

ever since olivia rodrigo released her debut album, SOUR, i have been listening to it on repeat (totally not kidding). so, after seeing a girl on tiktok do something like this, but with the avengers, i was inspired to make this post. there you go:

the poets as olivia rodrigo’s songs.

trigger warning: mention of su*c*de and mental health issues.

brutal: all of them. they’re teenagers, insecure sometimes, trying their best, but sadly not living the teenage dream (what is it, that fucking teenage dream, anyway?). “if someone tells me one more time "enjoy your youth, " i’m gonna cry” and they can’t quit what they’re doing, because their parents would most likely be hurt. “and they'd all be so disappointed 'cause who am if, if not exploited?” they once recited the lyrics of this song as a poem, during one of their meetings, and they were all laughing their asses off. life at hell-ton is brutal, what can i say?

traitor: knox, of course. “god i wish that you had thought this through, before i went and fell in love with you” or “guess you didn’t cheat, but you’re still a traitor” just hit different for him. he thinks about chris when he listens to this song, that’s for sure..! we can’t really blame chris for knox falling in love with her though,, sorry buddy.

drivers license: knox, again. poor boy listens to this song while riding his bike, crying his eyes out. “but today i drove through the suburbs, crying 'cause you weren't around” chris isn’t with that blonde girl, she is that blonde girl. knox has never felt this way for no one, and it’s hard for him to imagine that chris is, well, doing okay without him. he thinks and talks about her all the time. “and all my friends are tired of hearing how much i miss you, but i kinda feel sorry for them 'cause they'll never know you the way that i do”

1 step forward, 3 steps back: todd. like many people (including me!) when he listens to this song, he doesn’t necessarily think of a past relationship (mostly because he has never dated anyone before neil). he thinks of his mental health struggles, such as his anxiety, instead. it’s hard, sometimes. he thinks he’s getting better, but then realizes he isn’t.. “got me fucked up in the head, boy. never doubted myself so much. like am i pretty, am i fun boy? i hate that i gave you power over that kinda stuff” need i say more? this song is as soft, but as sad, as he is.

deja vu: keating. this is.. kind of a joke, but only because i didn’t know who to pair this song with. john was an original member of the dead poets society, and knowing that now, other teenage boys are taking turns reading poetry, in the old indian cave, reminds him of his teenage years. “so when you gonna tell her that we did that, too? she thinks it's special, but it's all reused. that was our place, i found it first” olivia’s music isn’t the type of music he normally listens to, but after hearing students (the poets) talk about her album, during his class, he decided he’d give it a try. he likes it. he loves the lyrics, mostly.

good 4 u: CHARLIE. he loves screaming the lyrics to this song. especially the bridge and the last chorus. “LIKE A DAMN SOCIOPATH!” cameron has to beg him to turn the volume down,, he doesn’t listen to him, obviously, and instead turns the volume up. his argument? ‘this song is meant to be played loud!’ to which cameron responds ‘but not that loud! i’m trying to study!’ he thinks looking at his roommate directly in the eye when singing “baby, what the fuck is up with that?” exactly the way olivia does is funny. cameron just rolls his eyes every time, but it’s hard for him to hide the smile taking place on his lips.

enough for you: pitts. although he and stev/phen are both super, super smart, i think meeks is the ‘genius’ of the group. and that, can, sometimes, make pitts feel like he might not be good enough for his boyfriend, whom he loves very much. “and i knew how you took your coffee, and your favorite songs by heart. i read all of your self-help books so you'd think that i was smart” whenever he doubts himself, meeks is the first to reassure him and tell him he’s more than enough, but still.. “'cause all i ever wanted was to be enough for you” he listens to this song with his earphones, always, so no one knows he listens to it on repeat.

happier: meeks. ever since charlie got expelled, he can’t stop listening to this song. these two were pretty close, (“he flatters me, that’s why i help him with latin”) and stev/phen doesn’t like thinking about his friend being in a new school, and spending time with other people. “so find someone great but don't find no one better. i hope you're happy, but don't be happier” he wishes charlie would still be with them, at welton, even if he hated it. “your friends aren't mine, you know, i know. you’ve moved on, found someone new” or “does she mean you forgot about me?” he’s being a bit overdramatic, considering charlie comes to see the poets at least once a week, and still attends the dps meetings.. but anyway.

jealousy, jealousy: cameron, because, yes, he’s smart and everything, but he’s still jealous of other people, and wishes he were different. he thinks he should be like the other guys. “all i see, is what i should be, happier, prettier, jealousy, jealousy” he also thinks that, maybe then, people would like him more </3. he knows no one really hates him, but feels like no one really likes him, either. and in his opinion, it’s because he’s.. him. “I'm so sick of myself, i’d rather be, rather be, anyone, anyone else” just like mr. k, this type of music isn’t what he usually listens to, but he relates to this song so much, he can’t help but listen to it at least once a day.

favorite crime: neil. just like todd, he doesn’t associate this song with a relationship he had in the past. actually, he thinks of his father (and his mom, a bit, too) and all of the things his dad forces him to do, even if it upsets him. “those things i did, just so i could call you mine. the things you did, well, i hope i was your favorite crime” i know we don’t usually talk about the canon ending, but i have to. mr. perry didn’t want his son to pursue his dreams, and planned neil’s life for him, which made him feel so miserable, he sadly committed su*c*de.. but then, his dad wasn’t blamed for it, to preserve his reputation. “and i watched as you fled the scene, doe-eyed as you buried me, one heart broke, four hands bloody” todd knows this was neil’s favorite song. he listens to it once in a while, in their room, alone, and cries.

hope ur ok: all of them. do they know how proud i am they were created? after all they’ve been through, especially their family problems, i’m glad they found each other. “she was tired 'cause she was brought into a world where family was merely blood” and even when life throws bad things at them, they always stay strong, and support each other through everything. they’re very brave. “well, i hope you know how proud i am you were created, with the courage to unlearn all of their hatred” i love them, my beautiful poets <33

[writerrachelspangler]

The long awaited book release

So, I wrote a book. I mean it’s my 18th book, so like the book writing itself isn’t a surprise, it’s sort of my job, but the fact that I got this particular book written and published is a big deal.  

For the like 4 of you who actually follow this haphazard Tumblr, you know that I started my account because I’d been in a massive writing funk since my friend Diane Gaidry died. I hadn’t felt even remotely cohesive in my creativity for almost a year. I’d already abandoned two other projects in that time. And when I found Tumblr I wasn’t trying to do my job at all. I was mostly laying on my couch, grief stricken and watching too much Gentleman Jack. It was really that show and the fandom surrounding it that made me want to start writing again.  

If you read my early posts here they’re filled with both trepidation and hope, and totally interspersed with GJ fandom reblogs, along with the occasional gushing about other things that got in the way of being a functioning professional (I’m looking at you gender dysphoria and conservative family members).

This was not the novel writing process I’d ever known or would recommend to an aspiring author. It went against everything I’d ever learned about how to be successful in my field. Tumblr is not well organized, does not facilitate strong focus, it doesn’t conform to high ideas of craft or form. It’s not filled with serious topics to hone the mind or sharpen creative stamina, (at least not the way I follow it). Most of all it draws more heavily on the work of others than anyone who fears copy right lawsuits should ever be comfortable with. For me Tumble was pure fandom, the exact thing people warned would lead to the watering down of my voice and derivative story telling. And yet, the voices I found here were also so unapologetically enthusiastic I dove right in, not in spite of all those things, but because of them! The content I used as a crutch was passionate, unrepentantly whimsical, and wildly joyous in ways I desperately longed to be again. And I’ll be damned if it didn’t work

At first I would write like two paragraphs of my own work then, totally exhausted and emotionally spent, I’d zip over here to emote and/or distract myself for the rest of the day. Many of my colleagues posted about their own impressive progress, and shook their heads at me. But just like learning to ride a bike with training wheels I got less wobbly as I went. I grew more confident, and a picked up speed. Soon queer Tumblr became less of a distraction and more of a reward for a job well done. Then it became a way to unwind after a full day of writing. I leaned on the mental/emotion supports less and less, until one day I realized the training wheels had fallen off and the writing had actually become it’s own inherent support system. 

From there I took off, and the book took off, too. Modern English not only finished strong on the first draft stage, it flew threw edits, and copy edits, and early reviewers. Everyone who got their hands on it talked about how it was just “one of those special books.” The kind that reads like an effortless gift from the muse.  

I still don’t know if I should laugh or cry when they stay that.

Nothing about this was easy. Nothing about it was normal. This was a mess of absurdity, heart wrenching, teeth gnashing, and clinging to random lesbian period romance memes with all of my fingernails. 

It wasn’t even until recent weeks that I could loosen my white knuckled grip and breathe deeply enough to look in the rearview mirror at how far I’ve come. Reading my early posts now is humbling. I couldn’t see the path forward from there, which I suppose makes sense. I was so lost, but after I found my way again I forgot to bring you all forward with me.

I’m sorry for that. Once I started writing on the book in earnest I stopped writing here.  And I’m not sure anyone particularly cares, but it didn’t seem right to just ghost Tumblr.  Y’all deserve better.  At least a few of you took me at my worst, so you deserve to see me at my best.

So here you go. Here’s the full circle moment. The culmination of the crying, and crazy random fandom, and deep dives into obsession, and therapy style blogs, and my complete submersion into the queer content sections, and my trying to wrestle all of that into something that meant something, something I could make sense of, and something I could give back to the community that gave so damn much to me.

Modern English, my 18th full-length, women loving women romance novel is now available wherever great queer romances are sold.  

The reviews are rolling in, and every one who reads it assure me no one would ever know what I went through while writing. 

But I know, and you all know too.  

So thank you. 

https://www.amazon.com/Modern-English-Rachel-Spangler-ebook/dp/B08NWF3RC7/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Rachel+Spangler+Modern+English&qid=1613866103&sr=8-1

[archaeopter-ace]

Rules: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder,  regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Send me an ask with the  title that most intrigues you and I’ll post a little snippet of it or  tell you something about it. And then tag as many people as you have  WIPs.

I was tagged by @earth-ambassador-jim​, thanks!

Oh man I wish I had a single WIP folder. Instead my works are smeared across Microsoft OneNote, Gmail drafts to myself, a bookshelf’s worth of notebooks, a small basket filled with loose pieces of paper, Word Docs (both on my laptop and on an external drive), Google docs, and now Scrivener.

Behold! The closest thing I have to a dedicated WIP folder 😭

(Most of those are from 2014 - 2016, I have mostly stopped writing on slips of paper in my back pocket)

In answering this tag game, it has been an absolutely wild ride diving back into my old works, swimming through files. There’s been a lot of ‘I totally forgot about that idea!’ and ‘what even is this, I have no memory of this.’ Also I write stream-of-consciousness on first drafts, so I’m also getting insight into the quality of the sandwich I ate on some day five years ago.

So. I am going to start with the WIPs that I am actively working on, followed by the WIPs that I did once actively work on, and I will omit things that never got their own title or doc, e.g. bits that were part of a stream-of-consciousness ramble in my gmail draft

The following are all document titles for my in-progress series, Don’t Listen to Kafka:

Kafka - Last Chance to Change Apoptosis Name

MetaEp & Intermission Act I

Apoptosis Notes

i’ve made similar documents before

Other Active WIP:

Night of the Living Stone

North Salem Possibilities

Ectober Day 9 - Mask

Ectomancy - DP x Dresden xover

Things that are more like Deadfics-In-Progress than WIPs:

The Way Things Fit Together

hey brother

GF/Trollhunters

More Impossible Things - Merlin x Flash xover

Relative Truth

88 Miles Per Hour

Peter and Jack

Gumshoe-Fly Pie

April Fools

Souvenir

Press Release

Childish Things

Things That Go Bump

Five Miles Under a Mountain

x gene horned devil matt

blue fire

GO/Lucifer

There’s probably more that I’m missing, but I have a terrible habit of giving docs undescriptive titles, e.g. “nano 2.3,″ “a new way to write,” “note bene,” “logging,” “blurb,” “news,” and “apparently i’m having 15 drafts.” So it’s kinda hard to know what is and is not a WIP

I’m tagging @rebelliouswhirlpool​, @yellowmagicalgirl​, @violetemerald​, but as always participation is completely optional!

[talkingtea]

I've seen the thread and the video on sm before. And I still don't understand what she did other than answer Qs when asked. THE SHOW did the baiting! Random people not liking Iris becoz of their deep seated racism is not on dp. And most of these clips, if not all of them, are from season 1&2. She simply stopped talking about Barry and Caitlin as a romantic ship. And she did her best and still does to be friendly with Candice. I don't get why Candice fans simply want dp to kiss up to cp when cp clearly doesn't want to be anywhere near her. It's hard to stand by some1 or speak up for them when they don't want anything to do with you. But she still tries to be friendly with her. In sdcc16 panel she was asked who she'd like to have more scenes with, she said, "I'd like more scenes with Candice we don't have much scenes together." And when the interviewer said it's nice to not have two woman fighting over a guy she also agreed said, "totally".

If she doesn't tweet about cp, cp fans go, "that racist bitch can't even bring herself to mention cp/iw". She was asked about how she get hate on sm, she could have talked about just that but she brings up how Candice gets a lot of hate and cp fans go, "is she saying the hate she gets and the hate cp get are the same!?!! That bitch". She mentions cp's name on interviews agreeing with what cp said, cp fans go, "she even mentioned cp's name that fake bitch!" She doesn't seem like a difficult or unapproachable person yet you guys still hate her. In sdcc19 in an intrvw Candice says, "I forgot, where do I work?" And she immediately said, "citizen". She's not like this in 1 or 2 inrvws. She's always approachable and open.

What's even more ridiculous is getting bombarded with hate because of a magazine cover head line she is not responsible for. Magazine editor's will go for the most controversial thing they can put in the front. They love drama because drama sells. It is no way the models area of expertise. EVERYONE from the cast was silent about sm hate from season 1-4, EVERYONE. But you guys unleashed the hell only on dp. She does not deserve to be demonized the way she has been over the years. The thread and the video is a prime example of childish blame game. Shentel or whatever her name is plays a silly game of kiss, marry, kill and she is called out for it? Emily doesn't mention Iris on an intrvw she has somehow undermined cp? And I don't think CL is more close to dp than cp but even she felt the need to defend dp because they(actors part of dctv) see what's going on. And how unnecessary and toxic it is. And the cast sees what's going on too. Candice gets called all sorts of things just for being black and it's borderline toxic, there's no going around it. But how is tearing down another woman who did nothing more than talk about what she's asked is standing against hate? You simply don't want her to talk about Barry which is crazy because like pretty much everyone on the show her story too revolves around Barry. But she did stop talking about him though thanks to cp fans. Since s4 whenever asked about the show she pretty much talks about kf and what's next for kf. But people find faults in that too! You can't claim to stand against hate towards one person while actively creating a toxic environment for another person on sm and act betrayed when someone so much so as speaks a sentence in her defence.

It's a long ask, sorry for that. But I'm just trying to make sense of all this, that's been going on for more than 6 years now. I used to only watch the show. If quarantine didn't happen I wouldn't have known just how toxic either side of this fandom is. And you wonder why the flash cast is "so boring and doesn't wanna share anything anymore".

*sigh*

We had half a mind to just ignore this but since you put all this time and effort into writing a novel to defend Danielle we figured we’d be nice and post it to see if others made it past the 3 lines that we read before we stopped. Our eyes were in danger of rolling out of our heads so we figured it was better to be safe than sorry.

As it were have you gotten this out of your system yet? Because, really, you’re wasting your time. Our opinions aren’t going to change and we doubt any of our followers minds will change either and that’s mostly because we’ve been around since the beginning and what we know isn’t based on some Twitter thread or a YouTube video. We saw it all when it happened back then and we know the ripple effect it has had even to this very day.

[absollnk]

Absol's Journey's End progression, act 1: prehardmode

(this post contains sarcasm not marked with /s because a., I'm not targeting any real people and b., It's for emphasis. I will also be explaining things that may not need to be explained to seasoned players in order to make this a little more accessible. Tw for sparse cursing)

wow

I'd like to call myself good at Terraria. I've played across several platforms since patch 1.1 and know way too much about this spectacular sandbox's intricate details. I can blaze through most bosses effortlessly if I'm prepared. I've done playthroughs of every class in expert mode (except summoner, couldn't find a slime staff even after farming :/).

It's so strange to be bitch slapped all the way back to square one just because I've never touched a keyboard before.

I don't remember what my initial key layout was, but currently, the important ones are-

WASD for movement

C for inventory

R for mounts

F for quick heal

B for quick buff

Space for jump

LeftAlt for smart cursor toggle

M for map

Left click for action and right click for interaction, and

Mouse 3 (scroll wheel *press* for grappling hook.

You should've seen my hour-one gameplay. It was sad. I couldn't change directions while jumping. I was regretting choosing expert mode difficulty. If I wasn't using journey mode's research system as a crutch, I'd probably still be pre-skeletron. I didn't even have enough skill to use the step stool accessory, which literally just requires holding up.

But, in the long run, I got better way faster than I could've anticipated. First, however, on irl day 2, I killed the Eye of Cthulhu on my fifth try after being torn apart by its last-resort Wacko Mode 4 times. At that point I was decked out in full gold gear with the fast and piercing jester arrows, so I really felt that the keyboard was holding me back considering that I usually do the eye armorless (admittedly I only had 100 life, but I usually do that too.)

The next day, slime rained. I thought that the king would be free gear, so I warped back to the surface to bring him out. He wasn't. He spawned on top of me, dealing 50+ damage immediately, wiping out half my total HP. I instinctively tried to use the shield dash to get the hell out of there, but I hit the inside of his body, which made me bounce back, which made me get hit again, resulting in death. The fight lasted less than 10 seconds, and I could only see the fucker for two of them.

With my spicy new tendon bow from the eye, I thought in my tilted rage that it would be a good idea to go and beat up the Brain of Cthulhu. I was itching for beefier armor and it was the gateway between me and crimson/molten gear. I set up an arena above the crimson made of two long rows of platforms covered in health regen-boosting campfires. With a stack of its spawn item (thanks journey mode), I brought in the first one to size up what I was dealing with.

I died pretty well. In fact, this is where I died the best out of the whole run so far.

The first attempt went surprisingly well. My lovely and incredibly sexy jester arrows made dealing with the creeper hoardes *relatively* easy. Phase two did not apply to that. I had brought along a burning mace because it had the dual functionality of circling the player or being shot out and coming back again like a baseball on an elastic string. This would theoretically allow me to attack the brain if it was far away and defend myself if it was too close to me. I did not know that the mace had very little knockback while it was spinning. This plan did not work.

ELEVEN atempts of trial and error later, I won. By that point, the creepers alone had dropped enough materials to make the crimson armor without ever actually killing the boss, which is pathetic. But I won, and I didn't cheat. I'm still in the easy baby phase of the game. At this point I'm starting to realize why most players statistically chop down a tree and ditch the game forever.

It's irl day 3. Next up on my blood feud against the children's video game was skeletron, the next step in progression that makes the final boss of prehardmode a little bit easier and the thing preventing me from seeing my hair. I set up and even longer 3-layer arena and prepared to not have fun, as skeletron is known in my head for being a dumb bitch who cheats with fast, homing projectiles and an un-telegraphed chain attack that will instantly kill you if you can't grapple out.

He took two tries. I don't get it. I was probably getting better at the controls by then, but *that much* better? Like, the successful attempt wasn't even that close. Whatever. I was annoyed that the stupid brain gave me so much trouble, and I seemingly couldn't be happy after a boss fight even if it went well. But, since we take those, I proceeded into the dungeon to find a bunch of disposable weapons and, more importantly, the cobalt shield. I didn't have to take knockback anymore. If I rematched the king slime then he was fucking dead.

The clothier moved in and I bought the familiar wig to reveal my luscious locks.

Queen bee is next. The fights were standard, but I learned that she apparently enrages on the surface? I always fight her there, except for this time when I stayed underground for funsies. She was so much easier underground. Good to know, I guess. I could've probably done her before even the Brain.

Because I'd never been able to before and because I happened to find the tavernkeep after the bee fight, I tried out the old one's army which logically and appropriately kicked my ass. It was a reality check for sure (things were going smoothly since after the brain minus movement) but it was also a neat experience.

I mowed through the gobins, finally maxed my hp, and then it became Wall Time. My loadout was now molten armor with the Molten Fury bow and the Sunfury flail (which for some reason has like ninety base dmg??? This is a PREhardmode weapon? It has NO business doing 90+ but hey I'll take it). I was also rocking the blizzard in a balloon, band of regen, fledgeling wings, lightning boots, and shield of Cthulhu. I felt like I was finally strong enough in-game and competent enough with the controls to advance to hardmode. I was finally good enough at the video game to change directions while jumping.

I built a roughly 1,900-block long bridge in hell out of the blast-proof dungeon bricks. My plan was to run far ahead of the wall and just kill it with dynamite. I grinded for a voodoo doll and yeeted it into the lava, murdering Andrew the guide with questionable morals and bringing forth the wall of flesh. Little did absol know that they forgot to pack the main part of their plan, dynamite. I realized this, contemplated in-game self murder to end the hopeless fight early, but then I had an epiphany. What if I didn't cheese the boss and fought it legitimately?

With my epic gamer status and pride on the line and expecting nothing more than failure, I whipped out my good ole 100-gotdamn-damage Sunfury and tore through the Wall's hungry appendages.

This is all cool and good on paper. I'm doing consistent damage and I'm not dying. That's how you kill bosses. Things are going well, life is good.

I check the map and learn that I've already used up two thirds of my hellbridge and that the wall was only just below half health. Oh no. Things are actually not going well and life is bad.

I switch to the bow, hoping that the speed and accuracy result in better DPS. Better it was, and I would be all set if it weren't for the Wall's gimmick. I was indeed doing more damage, but as it loses health, it gets faster. I'm at a point where I have to be running at full speed almost constantly to stay a safe distance away. The Wall's health still isn't in the dark red zone and I'm almost out of road. I'm starting to take steady damage from the exponentially faster eye lasers and leeches. I run out of bridge and have to hop from lava lake to building to lava lake in order to not burn alive in the infernal orange juice. New areas are being revealed on the map because I'm fighting in an area I've literally not been in yet. I'm too busy focusing on not being deep-fried that my aim suffers tremendously. I fumble while switching back to the flail for quality over quantity, costing me precious seconds. The wall now moves faster than my top speed. I mis-time a jump and right before the wall disintegrates me between itself and a building, it dies.

I audibly moan in real life.

I go and check the treasure bag after a few seconds of mental recalibration. I got a laser rifle and a ranger emblem, along with the standard demon heart which I immediately wolf down to slap on the emblem. I guess I'm a ranger now.

Recap:

King Slime: still alive

Eye of Cthulhu: five attempts

Brain of Cthulhu: twelve attempts

Skeletron: two attempts

Queen Bee: two attempts

Wall of Flesh: one attempt

The spirits of light and dark have been released and my gamer status is intact. Absol's next victim-victim relationship is with the Queen Slime, but that'll have to wait until the hardmode post :)

Thank you if you've read this far!! Lemme know what you think about this kind of thing, it was fun

[frightgothcar]

HEY! Hey, you, reading this!!! I fuckin love writing but what I need to be able to write is a little thing called approval!! If you like this please comment and/or reblog!!!!!!!!!!

Area 51 au thingy. Danny/Wes. Songfic? Not really but the whole idea came from this song. V is based off of @its-towarzysz (main)/ @we-all-horny-here (sanders sides sideblog)/ @cockworktower (dp side blog) you should check them out, they make hella good content. Thanks to all my friends who helped me with motivation/proofreading. Tw for Death, Blood, Guns, and Violence. (Tell me if I forgot anything). I love this pairing and the lack of content sparks deep anger in my soul!! :)) Thanks for reading, enjoy!!

EDIT: Posting this on ao3 also @/godcannotdefeatfanfic 

September 20th, 10:30 am

Area 51

Wes Weston had nothing to live for. Ever since his Mom had gone out for cigarettes on his 6th birthday and never come back his life had been a constant downward spiral. Maybe that was why he was in the middle of the Nevada desert, preparing to attempt to rush a highly armed government facility with a million other suicidal Millenials.  

He fanned his face with his hand. It was over 86 degrees and he was practically melting in his Casper High spirit T-Shirt and blue jeans. He contemplated getting into his pickup truck and blasting the a/c but considering he only had a quarter tank of gas left, and it was a good 20 miles to the nearest gas station, he decided against it. Instead, he got onto his phone and texted his friends for the third time that morning. 

Basketball-Boi: where r yall? its hot.

Phurry: we’re just driving in!! Do u see us?

Basketball-Boi: uhhh whats ur car look like

Phurry: the silver one

Basketball: V there are like a million silver ones what kind of car

Phurry: uhh Val says its called a subaru we’re right by a black car

Red_Huntress: They’re standing on the roof and waving. Can you see us now?

Wes looked up from his phone to see a person, about his age, standing on the roof of a silver Subaru, wearing a black band t-shirt and neon green booty shorts. Their long blond ponytail swished around their face as they jumped up and down excitedly. A girl stepped out of the car and began scolding her friend. She was wearing a matching red pair of shorts, there was black lettering on her backside that he couldn’t quite make out. He began waving back, which only excited the blond more. They lept over the brown-skinned girl and bolted towards Wes.

“Ready to fuck some aliens, Basketball-Boi?” They pulled him into a tight embrace.

“I was born ready!” He laughed, “How are you, V?”

“Pretty gay, thanks for asking.”

Wes opened his mouth to speak but V cut him off with an excited shout.

“Oh! That reminds me!” They slipped their arms out of their backpack straps and dug through the mint green bag for a minute before pulling a pair of hot pink shorts, “I wanted us all to match! Made ‘em myself!”

They flipped the shorts around to reveal ‘100% Nasty’ embroidered onto the ass in black. They then turned around to show off their own message, that read ‘Trash Man’.

“I made one for Val too, c’mon, we have to wear them!!”

Wes grabbed the shorts and held them to his hips. “Is this what you needed my measurements for?”

They nodded enthusiastically, “I was gonna make us team jackets, but that’s so cliche.”

“Huh, I mean, don’t get me wrong, these are… great, but are you sure pink is my color?”

V rolled their eyes, “Of course I’m sure, Wes! Just put them on, you’ll see.”

Wes sighed and walked behind his red truck for some privacy, not that there was much of that, the field was crowded with cars. He pulled down his blue jeans, thankful for the breeze on his legs, and pulled on the shorts. They were a perfect fit, clinging to his waist, and resting on his barely existent hips. The feeling of showing so much skin was odd to him, he’d never worn anything that short in public, but the look on V’s face made it all worth it to him. They didn’t laugh like he’d been expecting them to, instead clapping their hands and going on about how relieved they were that the shorts actually fit. He did a quick turn for them, and they nodded in satisfaction.

“I think it’s about time we caught up to Val, did y’all remember to bring soda?”

“Only the finest Mountain Dew the 7/11 could provide, M’lady,” V grinned. 

“Than shall we be going, M’lord?” Wes held out his arm.

“Indubitably.” V linked their arm through his and they wandered through the crowd, searching for Valerie’s silver Subaru. 

“Wes! V! Over here!” Val called, waving the hand that wasn’t holding a Mountain Dew at her friends. The two of them waved back and jogged toward her. 

“Hey Val, long time no see,” Wes grinned as he pulled her into a hug.

“I missed ya, Weston,” Val reached up to ruffle his hair, but Wes dodged, pulling her into a headlock instead. 

“Missed ya too, Grey,” He gave her a noogie and released her, leaving her free to jump onto him and boost herself high enough to get revenge.

“Aww, adorable! Old lovebirds rekindling an old flame?” V fluttered their eyelashes at their friends, who immediately recoiled.

“Ew, no! Wes? If I had to pick a guy, maybe. And that’s a hard maybe. I’m too gay for this.” Valerie picked up her can from the hood of her car and took a swig.

“Yeah! She’s like my little sister!”

“Hey, I’m older than you!”

“By like two weeks!”

V broke into laughter, “Cool it lovebirds, I’m only joking.”

Val and Wes rolled their eyes at V, who was now on the ground, rolling with laughter. 

“Permission to pour some soda out onto our hilarious friend’s head?” Val asked teasingly.

“Permission granted! Fire at will!” Wes saluted. Val tipped her can enough to sprinkle V with the sticky green drink. They got to their feet, still laughing, and lunged for Val’s can. They knocked it backward, spilling soda all over Val’s shirt.

“EEK,” She squealed, “You’ll pay for this, Trash Man, If it’s the last thing I do!” 

She tried to push the can towards V, but they still had a grip on her arm. They tugged the can back and forth for a few seconds before it crumpled under the pressure.

“Shit!” Val swore, letting go of the can and cradling her palm. “I think I cut myself.”

V dropped the can, game of tag forgotten, and crowded next to their friend. Wes joined their huddle. 

“I think I have a first aid kit in my truck. How bad is it?” He asked.

Val opened her hand to reveal a small, but deep wound on the side of her palm.

“Shit, I’m so sorry, this is all my fault, if I hadn’t-” V began.

“Naw, it was as much my fault as yours. Anyway, we were having fun, and it’s really just a scratch. Keep focused on those Aliens, Private!” Val reassured them.

“Aye aye, Captain!”

Wes walked back to his truck, ignoring the stares of passerby. He grabbed his first aid kid (thank god for boy scouts) and walked back to Val’s car.

“So,” Wes ripped open a disinfecting wipe with his teeth and got to work cleaning her hand of blood. “How’s your dad?”

“He’s doing-” She drew in a sharp breath as he dabbed along the wound with a clean wipe. “Fine. The new job’s working out great, he’s happier than I’ve seen him in a while.”

Wes nodded and began wrapping her hand in gauze, “I’m glad. He wasn’t himself when you left.”

“It really all did work out for the better, didn’t it,” V smiled and handed Wes a length of medical tape. “Oh! I forgot! Val, show Wes what your ass says!”

She groaned, “Do I have to?”

V scowled, “Of course you have to, it was your idea!”

“I was just joking!”

“Tsk tsk, I think you’ve known me long enough to know that when it comes to cursed content, there are no jokes.”

“C’mon Val, it can’t be worse than ‘100% Nasty’,” Wes smirked.

V gasped dramatically and feigned offense, “You’ve wounded me! I work so hard, and for what, ungrateful friends?”

“Fine, if it’ll make you happy I’ll show him my ass. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She winked at him before turning to show her backside. Black embroidery spelled out ‘Booty Hunter’.

Wes burst out laughing, which quickly turned to hysteric noises only vaguely resembling laughter, squeals, and snorts with shrieking giggles between them. V and Val couldn’t help but join in. The second one of them stopped laughing someone would whisper Booty Hunter and it’d start all over again. 

“Okay, okay,” Wes gulped in air, “We- hic -should calm down now.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Val wiped a tear from her eye, “I am the Queen of Calm.”

V got to their feet and dusted themself off. “Totally calm. Calmer than a… something calm.”

“When does the raid start?” Wes pulled out his phone and checked the time. 12:00.

“Around, 12:30ish, we have time.” V waved their hand.

“I dunno, it’s already 12, maybe we should start getting ready.”

“What do you mean it’s already-” V snatched the phone from his hand, “Huh. Time sure flies when you’re having fun.”

“Wait, get ready for what exactly? I mean, we’re here, we’ve got our shorts on, there’s enough Mountain Dew in my car to drown an elephant, what else is there to get ready?” Val questioned.

“Uhhh, I dunno, stretch?” Wes shrugged, “It just feels like we’re forgetting something. What exactly is the plan for this whole thing anyway? Are there gonna be waves? Do we all go at once? This is a pretty poorly organized event.”

Val shrugged, clearly unphased by the lack of organization, “We’ll just go when everyone else starts running. I’m sure the start of gunfire will tell us when.”

“Look, if it’s making you so worried, we can stretch before. I’m sure everything will be fine. Plus, we all get alien Girlfriends, so it’s a win-win!” V put their hand on his arm. Wes smiled thankfully down at them.

“Yeah, that’s probably it. Yall must think I’m being a nitpick-”

“Not at all! You’re probably right, after all, it must be at least a mile to the base from here, and we can’t let cramps keep us from sweet sweet alien romance.” Val propped her leg up on the hood of her car and pressed her head to her knee, “Plus that’ll give us an advantage over the Kyles.”

V nodded and fell into a lunge, “We’ve been training since July for this, can’t let it get away now because we forgot to stretch.”

Wes bent over and touched his toes, “Thanks y’all, you’re really the best friends I could ask for.” 

The screech of a megaphone rang out through the valley. A voice came through the static, “Raiders! Get into position, we’re storming the gates in exactly fifteen minutes!” 

A cheer broke through the crowd as people began chugging what was left of their sodas and migrating towards the front lines. 

“Well, this is it I guess. If I don’t make it out of the raid, put this on my tombstone.” Wes gestured downward, where he was holding his hand in a circle. 

“Dammit!” Valerie chuckled as Wes gave her a playful punch in the arm. 

“You’ll never take me alive!” V shouted and sprinted forwards as Wes moved towards them.

“On your marks!”

“Wanna bet on that?” Wes shouted back, weaving through the crowd to catch up with them.

“Get set!”

V pushed forward, using their small frame to their advantage, easily losing the taller one in the crowd.

“Raid!”

The mob roared, then began thundering forward, but the deafening sounds of the people were nothing compared to what followed. Thousands of guns began firing at once, hitting everyone and everything in the vicinity. Wes watched with horror as the first wave of people were mowed down right before his eyes. A flash of neon green caught his eye through the carnage. He ran towards his friend, who was standing, paralyzed, next to a few other survivors. He shouted their name, and just as they turned their head another hailstorm of bullets rained down. The first one embedded itself right into V’s chest, right above their heart. Wes sprinted to catch his injured companion, but by the time he got there the life was already draining from their eyes.

“V! V, can you hear me? Don’t go into the light, hold on, ok? You’ve got this, V, answer me!”

He pressed his head to their chest, a weak heartbeat answered him. “It’s gonna be okay. Shhh, you’re okay.” 

Something wet dripped down his face, and he realized he was crying.

“...Wes,” V rasped out, then began violently coughing up blood. Little flecks of red peppered Wes’ face like freckles. “Fuck an alien for me, okay? Can you promise me that?”

Their body went limp in his arms. 

“V? V! V, wake up, please, that can’t be it, please V, you’re only 17, please!” He shook their corpse, but to no avail. V was gone. He closed his eyes and let out a shuttering breath before standing up, still clutching their body in his arms. 

“Second wave! On your marks!” The megaphone blared to life.

The crowd let out another, less confident cheer. After seeing all the carnage most of the raiders were less enthusiastic to ‘see them aliens’. But this time Wes had made up his mind. He was going to make it into that Government facility, and he was gonna burn that motherfucker to the ground.

“Get set!”

He laid his friend on the ground and pressed a kiss to their forehead. If it wasn’t for the massive amount of blood they could’ve been sleeping.

“Go!”

Wes screamed with all the anger he had in him and charged forward. Bullets rained down near him, but this time there were less of them. This time he had a chance. He saw the gate coming closer. He was only 50 feet away, he could make it! He hopped over the fence, ignoring the blaring of sirens, and kept running. He pushed his way into the building, where, surprisingly, there was no security. It looked like they had invested all their soldiers into protecting the outside of the base. His adrenaline rush began to slow down. He dragged his feet down the linoleum hallway, looking at his bloodsoaked hands. 

“What the fuck just happened?” He whispered to himself, still shellshocked. A flicker of light caught his eye. Grateful for a distraction, he turned his attention to what looked like a futuristic control panel. The buttons were labeled in some sort of code, their luminescent surfaces grinning up at him.

“Looking for me, Short-Shorts?” A calm voice echoed through the hall. Wes whipped around, ready for a fight.

“Why so on edge, Ginger? Surely I’m not that intimidating.” It purred.

“Who are you?!” Wes shouted. He winced at the echo. Did he really sound that unhinged?

“On your left.” 

He turned and found himself face to face with the most beautiful boy he’d ever seen. He looked about his age, maybe 17. His skin was tan, but had a slight blueish tint, as if he’d been without oxygen for a while. Poking from his tuft of pearly white hair was a pair of blur antenna. He had a small build, maybe 5 feet tall at best, but was floating at eye level with Wes. Speaking of his eyes, they were quite possibly the most gorgeous thing about him. He had eyes greener and glowyer (is that even a word? Either way it was true.) than toxic waste, his pupils were like a cat’s, slit down the middle. He was clothed in a baggy black prison jumpsuit. He looked almost alien. Wes realized with a start that he must be an alien. 

“Are you done staring?” The boy asked, snapping Wes out of his trance. “It won’t be long before the guards realize you’re in here, and I’d rather get out without a bullet hole.”

“I- I don’t- what are you?” Wes stammered.

“I’m Project Phantom, or Danny if you prefer. What’s your name?”

“I’m… Wes?”

[xo-dailypier-blog]

this is not a recap;

     hey cumguzzlers,

It has come to my attention that Lady X took it upon herself to rate the nether regions of the men of Santa Monica. Unfortunately her assessment was BIASED and hardly based on facts. So as a JOURNALIST, I have taken it upon myself to get to the TRUTH. Today will be a Top 9 list of the men in this town, and their BEDROOM PERFORMANCES.

I’m not revealing actual sizes, because I firmly believe that it’s all about the motion of the ocean. And if you think I’m giving a run down on every SCRUB in this town, you’re out of your mind! I WISH I could have made this a Top 10 but most of the guys on Lady X’s assessment, have already been exposed in the fuck hut tapes during Summer Crush, and honestly? Don’t even make the cut for the top 5. Like, we KNOW the #DemonDick is low-key worth the hype (BUT YOU SHOULD STAY AWAY FROM IT BECAUSE HELLO? IT RUINED TWO RELATIONSHIPS IN LIKE THE SPAN OF A DAY! AND IM SURE THE BUCK DOESNT STOP THERE!), and we GET IT, Adam has a massive ROD, and I’m sure (Power Top) Asher, his brother, isn’t that far off. Vic IS well endowed AND can make things EROTIC. And we all know about Jack, who is also well endowed but has, like, erectile dysfunction or whatever. Oh, and don’t forget Daddy Sorrentino is obvs a beast in the sheets, but I’ve been telling you guys that since, like, ever. And I’m honestly on a Jamie/Cunty Sabbatical atm, they’re going through a difficult time after Cunty cheated, so who really needs their dick-info broadcasted on top of all that, ya know? (Cunty deff comes in at an alleged 9 inches, which is bigger than Jamie, BUT he (Cunty) never uses his junk on Jamie because, like Asher, Jamie is a Power Top. (but you didn’t hear this from me). Look, if any guy is left off the list that you have interest in, like, just ask Phobe. I’m sure she’ll know.

But before we get started, Congratulations are in order! You guys voted on Hottie of the Moment, and we have a winner!

It’s none other than Miss Fraudi Zirconium herself (@heidistarks​) The queen of bargains has stormed onto the scene in her Wild Fable Couture and has CAPTIVATED the hearts of all Santa Monicans. In honor of her win, I am giving everyone a $25 gift card to Claire’s! If you go to their website and use offer code SharkThot, you too, can get the Heidi Look. When asked about her recent accomplishment she had this to say:

"It's about fucking time." - Fraudi Zirconium Stark, 2019

Congratulations, again Fraudi! You go girl, work that Forever 21 tracksuit, bitch!

NINE - ALEC CLARKE @alecxclarke​

One of the wangs in question that Lady X TOUCHED ON was Alec Clarke. She mentioned that Alec was more than likely LACKING in the his SOUTHERN MEAT DEPARTMENT. So obvs i had a BONE to pick with this assessment because Alec’s fan base is GETTING UP there with Jamie Carter’s so we have to know what he got in them jeans. Sadly ... while his junk is fine. His way around the bedroom is is abysmal, I honestly thought it was a PHALL-ACY but one girl who is one of his past flings, wrote to me after seeing Lady X’s post. She has asked to remain anonymous...

Hey DP (and Lady X),

I saw your post about Alec and you’re wrong about his size. He’s actually pretty girthy and lengthy or whatever. But he is honestly one of my worst encounters. We met on a dating app, that shall remain nameless. So fast forward to sexy time, and once we started making out it was a tragedy! No tongue, no passion. It was like kissing a mcfucking corpse! His lips were like, so dry, but, whatever, that’s not the problem. Once I started giving him a blow jay he just randomly burst into tears, and said he couldn’t do it anymore, and asked if I wanted to play fucking Yahtzee. I left and bought Listerine. I think you should look into if he is like this with all the girls, instead of his size. Bc that’s the real tea. Anyways, Love the Blog! Kisses!

Its always such a disappointment when this happens. OBVIOUSLY our HoneyBun Alec has some issues to work on. I know he has a Crazy life but I didn’t think things were this HARD for him.

Overall Rating: N/A

Favorite Position: Again, N/A. I could hardly find girls who’ve had sex with him ................. INCHresting. (Ok, that was the last one).

Downside: I mean, Hello? He breaks out in tears mid-coitus! He IS the downside!

Alec! Write into us with your side of the story! I prom (half a promise) that I won’t believe the rumors. Love ya, Honey Bun!

EIGHT - SKYLER DAVIS @skylerxdavis​

No idea where Lady X got the idea that he had the biggest LOVE MISSLE in town, but it is absolutely FALSE. And in fact, what I’ve heard about his performance in the bedzzzZzZzZzzzzzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzZzZzzzz ZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Overall Rating: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Favorite Position: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Downside: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZzzzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

Alleged Body Count: zzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZzzzzZz

SEVEN - NOAH SINCLAIR @nhsinclair​

So next on the list is Noah Sinclair. This one will be brief, because it really threw me for a loop. So I’m sorry to report, that Noah has a Chode. I know. I’m actually crying while typing this but this is only the word on the street, so take it with a grain of salt.

“Darla” (fake name) wrote in to my blog to refute Lady X’s claims. She writes:

I’ve had half way sex with Noah one time and when he dropped his pants I literally laughed. Not to body shame or whatever, but I, like, couldn’t have sex with him because the condom didn’t fit. Sorry, didn’t have a Trojan Jr readily available? He’s good with his hands though.

So Noah has made the list in a sad and unfortunate entry. So ladies if you want Noah to DIP his NUGGET in YOUR sauce, you better make your move!

Maybe this is why he got that divorce. Ugh, poor Natasha. Let’s hope this is all a rumor, I would hate for it to be true.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️ (The hand thing is kind of important).

Favorite Position: Noah’s Nugget Number (No clue what this means, ask Diana or Natasha).

Downside: There is no downside if you, like myself, are privy to a good Nugget or two. #RanchPlease

MOVING ON!

SIX - LOGAN LANCASTER @loganlancaster​

Our next entry is none other than Long Dick Logan Lancaster. According to Lady X, Logan is average. Well I’m here to let you know that, thankfully, LDL lives up to his name (no nuggets here!). But you guys would have to get with him to truly find out how #blessed he is.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: Alligator Fuckhouse, according to sources. (DON’T Google it, live in ignorance).

Downside: The only reason, ya boi has gotten 4 stars instead of 5 is because of the rumors surrounding his hygiene. As we know, there’s been a debate on the internet about washing your legs. And Logan, an able bodied man, doesn’t do that. Nor does he take showers the way that he should. Many girls who’ve been with him have complained of smelling the stinch of onions and mildew while ENGAGING with him. Others have complained of a SALTY taste while going down on him. Most of the girls he’s BANGED have all been in the junkyard of his Auto Shop or whatever so maybe it’s a fetish for them? That’s no excuse for bringing that nasty ass behavior to every other girl in Santa Monica.

Thankfully a bunch of you have been sending body wash to his shop, so maybe we can LanCAST the mustiness away (If this is true).

Logan, please write in, I need to know the truth. But other than that, the dick is BOMB! But make sure you don’t over-do it on B.J. part though, sodium intake is v important and you wouldn’t want to get hypertension suckling on his salty ass COCK.

FIVE - EMRE YOGIOH @emre--yavuz

Ok, so next on the list is Emre Yugoslavia (or whatever his name is). Ok so ... buckle in ladies.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: The Lion King (I’m serious, don’t Google these things).

Downside: Ok, so Emre is supposedly into bondage. Which totally makes sense since he’s like, repressed from childhood. The whole missing sister thing really took a toll on his psych, since he’s parents totes forgot about him. Now he YEARNS for control. So the word is that he’s basically Christian Grey but not a literal abuser. He’s into bondage, slapping, SPITTING, choking, flogging, and whips and chains EXCITE HIM. An S&M Daddy! Now the only reason this is in the Downside section is because it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. Some girls find it disturbing, and others are totes into it. I’m the latter! Sign me the FUCK up! Choke me with those strong REPRESSED hands.

I noticed he and Olivia have been friendly recently, let’s hope she knows that she’ll be walking side to side after a night with him (no, but like, because of the flogging, not the dick). Once he’s done with those spread sheets at his hoity-toity big boy job, spread sheets take on a whole new meaning once the dawn comes. You go Emre Yahooligan! #callme

FOUR - DEVIN FLORES @devinxflores

First of all, I just want to give a big thanks to all of you for letting me call him Devin TORRES for the past few MONTHS like a complete MORON! I really appreciate you guys letting me disgrace the future KING of Santa Monica in such a terrible way! No really, you guys are the best. I love my fans <3.

Anyways, it’s well known that Devin and his Alaskan Bull Worm have burrowed through the city. Both the men and women alike have survived the DF experience, with ZERO complaints .... well, except for one ...

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: The Charizard (ONCE again, don’t Google. Just know that it involves fire ... And we aint talking about lighting no candles (which he allegedly seems to enjoy, how romantic!)).

Downside: As we have witnessed, Devin is a complete and total klutz! He is always getting himself into a bullshit that is literally all his fault. Didn’t he glue something to his head a few weeks ago -- actually, you know what? That’s not important. What I was getting at is, the main complaint about DaddyDevinFLORES is that during SACX the klutz JUMPS OUT. He has been rumored to have smacked his head on the headboard whilst switching positions (causing him to go UNCONSCIOUS for SEVERAL HOURS, which completely RUINS the mood). One of his Encounters even claimed that during a Romantic Toast of Wine, he clinked the glass so hard it broke and and SHARDS of GLASS went into his hands, causing him to bleed INSTANTLY. What the fuck, Devin?

How could someone who can handle balls so well out on the soccer court, not be able to handle them in the bedroom without accidentally falling out of a window in the process?

Ladies and Gents, much like Emre, Devin will have you walking Side to Side, but if it happens you might be suffering from brain damage after falling in the shower whilst trying to have sex with him. Please seek professional help immediately.

THREE - BERNBERN<3 @carverberncrd

Coming in at Number 3 is none other than Heidi’s personal play thing! We’ve seen his bulge through his Under Armour spanks, so Of Course I had to do a little research to find out the Lipton on HIS heat-seeker. I’ve reached out to his past flings and came to a general consensus.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The women I interviewed all confirmed he is an excellent LAY, so once again, I was right. BernBern<3 outsold your favs.

Favorite Position: Doggystyle (obvi)

Downside: He’s a Taurus so while he will indeed fuck you into a state of paralysis, it’s only to reach his Hedonistic Quota for the evening. He probs won’t even remember your name once he’s done, let alone learn it in the first place. So don’t get attached<3.

His star sign also explains his relationship with Fraudi. Not only are they both so annoyingly stubborn, but Two tops can rarely make it in a relationship. Just ask Ash — never mind. (Omg, btw Idk WHY everyone keeps asking. YES, the rumors are true! BernBern<3 gets pegged, but only by Heidi, it’s actually a testament to his masculinity and how he’s reached the apex of it at this point. But this is all old tea. So I guess Julian isn’t the only #DemonDick in the Stark Fam, Surprise?). Anyways, I ship them, but they get on my fucking nerves! They can’t even admit their undying love for each other, which is so obvious. But this isn’t about #Berni (working ship name), BernBern<3 has a massive COCK (and heart) and it has landed itself on the Top of the list.

TWO - SINRIQUE @itsenriqueaguilar

This one came as a surprise to me because I have no idea who this is. But yalls asses do! So here we have Enrique Aguilar, coming in at number 2 because of the OUTPOUR of receipts on the TALLY WACK ATTACK that he PACKS.

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: You know, there wasn’t a general consensus, he’s a man FULL of surprises.

Downside: No, you don’t understand, there is literally no downside. Look, here is a letter from one of the women he’s slept with. For reasons, you will understand REAL soon, this person has been kept anonymous.

Dear DP,

It’s been approximately 1 year, two months, 9 days, 5 hours, and 46 seconds since I Locked Eyes with Enrique from across a crowded room. That night would go to be on of the most invigorating, tantalizing, and romantic experiences of my life. But when I woke up the following morning HE was gone. I long for the day I see him again. My heart Aches at the thought of him with another women. Giving her the same love that HE gave to ME. I need you to understand that I was a grade A student at my university (4.0). I had an paid internship at an elite institution that OWULD HAVE LED ME INTO A PROMISING CAREER! BUT AFTER THAT NIGHT I BECAME RAVENOUS. I NEEDED MORE. AND IT CONSUMED ME! EVENTUALLY I LOST MY INTERN BECAUSE I STOPPED SHOWING UP! I FLUNKED OUT OF SCHOOL BECAUSE I DIDN’T CARE ANYMORE. I SEARCHED YOU ON ALL SOCIAL MEDIA BUT I COULDN’T FIND YOU! ENRIQUE I NEED YOU BACK IN MY LIFE! JUST FOR ONE MORE NIGHT! PEASE I KNOW YOU’RE OUT THERE! CALL ME AT [redacted]

Obviously Ivy, sent this in ... kidding (But honestly though? They did used to date, which ... yikes ... Good to know Daddy Rique has no standards, maybe we all have a chance. #shade #clapback #scalpt)

Anyways, I’ll have to keep an eye on this one, he seems to have a good head on his shoulders ... AND good head on his shoulders OKURRRRRR!!!

ONE - SEBASTIAN DELGADO @bashdelgado

That nerd that sat in the back of the classroom brainstorm his next nerdy ass invention with high-watered khakis, and orthopedic shoes in like, the ninth grade (because he was focused on Arch Support???????). That’s him, Sebastian Delgado. And Baby Daddy Bash has DITCHED the NERD LOOK and is now ready to SNATCH YOUR CAT BACK.

I’m sure everyone is just surprised as I am. But hey, they don’t call him “Bash” for nothing (except for the fact that it’s a shortened version of his name). He’s totes Bashing Puss with his MONSTROUS MEAT TRUNCHEON (and Buss?? Sebastian contact me about your sexuality).  

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Favorite Position: Missionary, he’s a man of passion and likes to stare DEEP into your eyes. #swoon #romantic #westan

Downside: Well if you HATE Love and AFFECTION, this one is not the one for you. Not only does he have a GINORMOUS, UN-NUGGETED MEAT SEPTOR/LAP ROCKET/VAGINA MINER, which, by the way, last a LONG time, He is EXCELLENT BOYFRIEND Material! He’s caring, patient, kind, resourceful, loyal, and he is well on his way to becoming a multi-millionaire -- which is NOT the reason he is number one! Money is not the goal here ladies (and guys? Seriously Sebastian, I need to know what’s up).  

Sebastian is the complete package and he has ALL of the other guys in this town QUAKING!

So Stan A True Man. Stan .... Sebastian.

And that, my friends, ends the TRUE tea on the wangs in this town. This was fun while it lasted, but I have some COCKtails that need my attention (ok, maybe THAT was the last one).

xo, DP

[far-away-stars]

Can I ask all for Tenja or Ezio (or both c;) for the NPC asks? -v-

Hi, yes, I did both kitties, which mean it took me too long and got tired of trying to make any sense halfway through it, so sorry if it doesn’t make any sense or it’s just lame here and there. :’D

Tenja Rel 

1. Would they be recruitable?

As a new Jedi in training, yes, I pretty much think so. Sith is harder since he’s quite individualistic and has a pretty possessi-ehm, protective brother.

2. Would they be a class specific character? (ie. Imperial Agent only. Republic character only)

Probably Jedi specific. Either Consular or Knight both.

3. When would you recruit them? Vanilla story? an Expac? Post KOTET?

I think vanilla would be good, learning “peacefully” on the field the ways of Jedi.

4. Where would you recruit them from?

Probably directly from the Temple on Tython, going to pick him up for a mission you were assigned for by some of the higher-ups.

5. What would their recruitment mission be?

He wouldn’t really need one, since, simply put, he doesn't really have a choice, I’ll assume whatever missions the characters made so far in name of the Republic and jedi were enough as a vote of trust for the Council. If we are talking some sort of loyalty mission … maybe he asks you to accompany him on some sort of travel to Voss? To get some help for his blindness. Not to cure it, but to stop the phantom pains probably, or the general headaches from using the Force to “see” while not being yet fully used to it. It may also lead to a dream-travel adventure of sorts (with some comments of his regarding how he can somehow “see” you now.)

6.What would be their original recruitment outfit?

Visas Marr in an all-black dye.

7. Would there be a character they don’t like? Would that cause you to choose sides?

Well. There would be issues if he somehow came into contact with his brother, Di’taqt, so any sort-of public alliance with the Sith would probably be problematic.

8. Are they romancable? Why/why not?

They are, but it’s probably not one of the easiest shells to break. He didn’t really allowed himself love for the sake of it, I mean, his last wife blinded him in a fit of rage. Also, well, he doesn’t mind sex at all, because it what he was used to as a Sith and wasn’t going to go chaste just for the sake of old ass Jedi traditions, so there’s that. But, well. He doesn’t think love has a change to turn out well. He can be proved wrong, if one is willing to try.

9. What would they say if you clicked on them?

“I’m listening.” “What do you have in store for us today, my friend?” “At your service.” “I do wonder if it’s a wise idea.” “Mhnn, gossip. I like it.” “No one suspects the blind man.”

10. Do they know any other in game characters? (ie. trained under Satele Shan during the civil war. Knew Talos before he went to Hoth)

Aside from his brother and general Sith acquaintances I don’t think so.

11. What weapon(s) would they have?

His lightsaber, standard force-sensitive equipment. His sly charm.

12. Are they better as a tank, healer or DPS?

Essentially DPS but he can manage a decent amount of healing, at least for himself. His specialty consists in entropic redistribution of the Force, basically siphoning life force from his enemies to himself, wasting away his enemies while healing and strengthening himself.

13. What gifts do they Love? Like? What would they say when you gave them a gift?

Weapon and Trophy, probably. Doesn't mind Luxury and Courting either. - “Well. Someone will certainly find a use to it.” “Appreciated.” “For me? I’m honored.” “I.. thank you, my friend. It’s truly wonderful.”

14. What would they say if you sent them away/changed them out?

“I’ll be there when you need me.” “Good rest to you.” “Oh, you wound me, leaving so soon.” “I dare you to find company as good as mine, my friend.”

15. What do they say when they heal you? What do they say when they are attacking?

“Hush, hush. Better already, is it?” “Don’t die on me, my friend, I don’t need that kind of stress in my life.” “Fresh air and the the kiss of life.” - “Tut-tut, I’ll show how it’s done.” “Let it go. It will hurt less if you don’t fight it.” “You are lacking finesse. Not that it will matter for longer still.” “Do us a favor. Don’t get up.”

16. What’s their idle chatter like? Do they talk a lot (when you arrive on each planet) or do they suddenly say something in some strange places?

They certainly like to say something at each planet, idle stuff, less prone to start random conversations if unprompted.

17. What letters would they send post vanilla class story/SOR/KOTFE

Romance :

He would probably be so frustrated trying to write one, or think of a gift, but, yeah, letters are not his forte. He wouldn’t know what to write, how to explain, how to express what he feels. Not the full story of his life on paper would be enough to try to begin to put into words how he feels to this day next to them.

He will try to prove it, to show it, to make it spoken in a language he hopes the character will understand, but, no. Not in a letter. He will write invisible patterns on their skin, he will smile his gratitude and hold his hopes in their arms with them. And hope they understand.

Also he would have to dictate it to a holo-transcriptor and yeah, no.

18. If they are recruitable in vanilla story, where are they during KOTFE/TET? What are/were they doing?

Probably still with the Jedi. He didn’t have much choice, he couldn’t really go back to the Empire, and it’s not as if they were faring any better Tho I bet he was one of the most frustrated ones after the deal with Zakuul, very bitter. He may have left at a certain point to join some resistance’s group, if anything not to feel so useless.

Lucretyiio 

1. Would they be recruitable?

Buy him food and he’s yours, honestly.

2. Would they be a class specific character? (ie. Imperial Agent only. Republic character only)

No, not really. He usually strays away from force sensitives and isn’t overly fond of the Empire, but well, he doesn’t judge people from covers. Or tries at least,

3. When would you recruit them? Vanilla story? an Expac? Post KOTET?

He’s pretty freestyle. He constantly asks for rides. Anytime would work.

4. Where would you recruit them from?

A Cantina. Could be anywhere from Coruscant, to Tatooine, to Nar Shadda.

5. What would their recruitment mission be?

Help him take down or stop some violent gang making business around probably, or something of the sort.

6.What would be their original recruitment outfit?

Canderous Ordo armor.

7. Would there be a character they don’t like? Would that cause you to choose sides?

Honestly.. Not really. There’s a lot of things he doesn’t like, but it’s not about choosing sides, not really, it’s about engaging ourselves to be the best we can possibly be. He doesn’t actually wants to shun or isolate people. He won't be comfortable or agree with everyone, but he wants to believe it’s doable while offering the chance to be united.

Honestly, like, yeah, he will vocally disagree to a lot of stuff if it involves violence, abuse and all that stuff. But he will stay as long as he believes in the cause. Being open about his opinions is also one of the ways he hopes will help changing things for the best and influence people with new ideas.

8. Are they romancable? Why/why not?

Yes, very. He’s so flirty. He just happens to become a mess if you flirt back. You may have to pick him up on a spoon. But he’ll sing all the love ballads to you.

9. What would they say if you clicked on them?

“Never wondered : why Banthas? No, like, that’s it. That’s the question. I can’t figure them out, mate.” “Why nothing rhymes with “Saresh”?” “Bada-mba-dababum mate, ya feel me?” “I. Need. Ice Cream.” “Oh shit, forgot the safety on the blaster.” “I’m here all day folks.” “No, man, you are the sidekick.”

10. Do they know any other in game characters? (ie. trained under Satele Shan during the civil war. Knew Talos before he went to Hoth)

Nope, don’t think so.

11. What weapon(s) would they have?

His brazen and melodious singing voice. His halliksete, if smashed on someone’s head. A blaster that he mostly knows how to use. Also smoke grenades. Because he often needs a diversion from when he needs to quickly disappear.

12. Are they better as a tank, healer or DPS?

He can damage things alright. Mostly willingly. I wouldn’t really trust him for anything else.

13. What gifts do they Love? Like? What would they say when you gave them a gift?

Underworld Good and Courting are his faves. Luxury and Cultural Artefact can work out. - “Hey, yeah, cool. What is it?” “Fancy ass cool, man!” “Fuck. Thanks.” “*sobbing*”

14. What would they say if you sent them away/changed them out?

“Hey, be back soon for another show.” “Yeeees, party time!” “No, yeah, of course I can be left to my own devices. No dangers. Ah.” “I’ll be back when you need me!”

15. What do they say when they heal you? What do they say when they are attacking?

“Hey. Wanna me to kiss it better?” “I’m trying!” “Hey, all better, Am I the best or am I the best?” “Oh fuck man that must have hurt.” - “Aaaand perfect strike for local handsome!” “Yes, that was… totally what I meant to do!” “Oh fuck that hurt.” “In your BEHIND, dude.”

16. What’s their idle chatter like? Do they talk a lot (when you arrive on each planet) or do they suddenly say something in some strange places?

He talks a lot. Don’t even get me started.

17. What letters would they send post vanilla class story/SOR/KOTFE

One of his letters, both romance and not-romance (tho romance’s content are slightly different) is the messy drafts of a song he’s trying to compose about the character. It’s some sort of epic tale, or brash cantina chant, or something more private. It’s a mess, with all his annotations. It’s very sincere. He says he never managed to finish it, and maybe it’s because he doesn’t want it to finish. Never.

18. If they are recruitable in vanilla story, where are they during KOTFE/TET? What are/were they doing?

Helping refugees. He started off really angry, blazen songs about Zakuul and how they all had to fight. Then… he just wanted to help people.

[valeriemperez]

Oh anon, no. SB actually happening wouldn't have stopped those crazies. If anything, it would have made it a million times worse because they'd actually have canon to base it off of. So instead of looking stupid because there's no canon basis, they'd potentially have "well, you never know what could happen!"

Right, that’s why I’m grateful it never happened in any real way, shape or form.

I’m wondering what the plan was for SB. Maybe they were supposed to start dating at the end of 1x12 hence find someone new to be crazy about. But how would that work w Ronnie returning? Was it going to be a love triangle with Caitlin/Ronnie/Barry w Ronnie winning? 🤔 It’s odd she kissed Bates then married Ronnie a few eps later. I imagine 1x15 would still play out. So Barry would be cheating on Caitlin with Iris? How do you think it would have worked out?

TBH, I don’t think there was much of a “plan” at all, per se. I think they floated the idea casually and it was shot down. I think they would have nipped it in the bud themselves because how are you gonna have Caitlin working with them after being dismissed by Barry in favor of Iris? Nah, they did themselves a favor by leaving it at idle talk. 

I feel like at most it would have been one attempted date, but Barry’s busy thinking about Iris and Caitlin gets Ronnie back the next ep and it’s never brought up again.

I was talking to someone else about this mess and told them I kinda feel turned off now from the show due to grants behavior. But I was reminded that we have other excellent actors to watch the show for. It’s true Carlos and Candice do such a good job.

Yes! Do it for them, lol. Plus now we’ve got JPK and Dani N., too. I think S5 has a lot of potential.

Don’t think this is hate but I’m really confused. You and others are saying GG is intentionally not supporting CP which I’m guessing makes him pretty horrible. What I don’t get is why does CP want to be his friend and speak so highly of him? We know CP has no issues with cutting someone like DP off for lack of support. I dunno I feel caught between two extreme point of views where one says GG doesn’t support CP at all and the other where they’re close friends. I’m wondering what’s the truth 😅

There’s a large gray area between GG not speaking out against the racial abuse Candice faces and him not being a good friend at all. Candice clearly respects and appreciates him, so he’s doing something right in her eyes.

Mr Flash man might have a hard time putting his words together right when talking about racism. On the other hand, he knows what to say on MLK day and he knows what to say when it comes to mental health like the I Don’t Mind campaign from Chris Wood. This is why I suggested to someone else that maybe he and Candice (jlm and cv if they want) should do a joint statement, post, whatever to show people they stand together against hate. Given the country’s divisive climate right now, it’d help.

A joint statement isn’t a bad idea at all, if he has a sincere desire to help but doesn’t know where to begin.

FYI people saying GG deleted comments saying he should support CP against racism is a rumor or straight up lie. When those who were claiming that was what he was doing were asked for info or proof their became very silent or ghosted. There’s a lot of reasons to be frustrated by the situation that doesn’t include making up things to use against GG.

I haven’t been on the twitter timeline or IG today, so I haven’t seen one way or another. Neither him blocking nor someone exaggerating surprises me, but in the end it’s about something bigger than him. It’s more relevant that media outlets be made aware and then proceed to make others aware about the situations for black actresses.

The one person who did get block said some rude as hell things to GG and called him a racist. I get people want to stand up for CP but if you go to a person’s post being aggressive and looking for a fight then guess what you’re going to get blocked. I agree with the points people are trying to make but attacking someone in their comment section gets nothing done.

I don’t think anyone would be surprised at G blocking over that. 

Depends. If it’s the same people that jump on every post he makes about any kind of deeper issue with but what about C is going through? comments I could see getting tired of that and blocking esp after he brought up something vulnerable to himself. But I agree with the overall point that even 1 public post by him would make a difference. They say the 1 on the call list sets the tone for the set, and I think something similar is also in fandom. His open support for WA for example has made a diff

I totally agree that the lead sets the tone. 

I’m torn. I get the point, I even agree (Minka post was great and it woulda been great to see such support from the cast for Candice in any season), but I don’t think underneath a scary post is the place the say it (Ik you didn’t). It’s like a middlefinger to the post, an ok that’s cute, but…

It would have been nice to see support like Minka’s, but it’s no surprise if he didn’t react well to that particular topic.

honest? this has been discussed since S1 and I think fans that keep @ing G about it are only setting themselves up. Doing the same thing expecting different results. Drama about the same thing. Years ago he said smt like C knows I love her (= I support her in real life). Right or wrong, we already got our answer. I like G and I’d probs cry happy tears if he posted how C deserves better than the racists, but 4 yrs in we know the deal. Puts on glasses: now young lady, go enjoy your weekend ;)

We definitely know our answer already!

Forgot to say, I don’t mean you when I say that. I know you didn’t @ him. I probably shouldn’t have even bothered you about it. I saw you were talking about it and piped in.

No worries, I know I didn’t @ him either. 😉

[dougmeet]

Dog Police 

Nobody knows who you are...until now

Dog Police nobody knows who you are ... until now! PLUS 1-800 WATCH Memphis' Strangest Video https://t.co/JC8H3PADrx https://t.co/eSKKNDYRG3 — mrjyn (@mrjyn) 12 septembre 2019

Dog Police 1-800

I finally became friends with the leader of the Dog Police.

Met him, interviewed him.

The video I uploaded has long since been taken down, but it became my most popular Video

I ever posted at the time...

Thanks, Sam Shoup for your cooperation and kind words....

WHAT THEY'RE SAYING ABOUT DOG POLICE

In 1985, at Memphis studio 485 Hollywood Memphis

The Dog Police

recorded an hilarious song, then video, showcasing their

canine-teeth approach to Memphis music.

Also known as The Tony Thomas Trio, the group featured, Tony Thomas Tom Leanardo

Sam Shoup

Dog Police Comments and info

I thought this clip was lost for eternity. I'm forever grateful and thank you for this gem.

Sam Shoup puppy is from Memphis, Tennessee. the old Shoe Productions. I was there!

Never heard of William Macy.

lly is an entire album of satirical songs called simply "Dog Police". I've been trying to explain this video to people for about 1,000 years. Thank you for confirming the fact that my brain did not make this song and video up.

The keyboard player looks like William H. Macy. My god. It's like Hurra Torpedo, Devo and Blue Öyster Cult got together for a side project. THIS is my YouTube account. We all know that furriers are flapping it to the dog-girl in this video. HOLY CRAP!! I have not seen this video since 198-freakin'-4! I actually came to think that I had just imagined the whole thing. Thank you for providing me with proof that I was not nearly as deranged as I thought I was! i just shat myself in fear I remember "1 800" also.

I thought I was the only one in the world who remembered this video? it took 2nd place behind RAIL in the MTV Video Contest back in like 1982?

THAT DOG CHICK WAS HOT AM I RITE GUYS?

no, you are, in fact, quite wrong, my friend. she was a cat.

Digney Fignus won.

His video is posted on YouTube. Just search for his name and you'll find,

The Girl With the Curious Hand

It makes me remind La Máquina del Rock in Lima city, Perú. Thanks! i do member this.. but i still don't get it i do like the drug fragrance though they said they were the ART BARF FAR ARR This was the video that SHOULD have won the "MTV's Basement Tapes" contest back in about 1982. It is so crazy and imaginative! Instead, some heavy metal group made up of 10 year olds won. GAG... how "cute." It was such a rip-off. This video is a classic! But it came in second place. That has made me mad for all these years. Hopefully these artists have had success elsewhere. The band was honestly called: "The Dog Police!" The band they lost to was called Trak. I remember them because they were featured in LIFE magazine's edition on teenagers in 1984. Google them and the name Derita, because Trak was like a Leif Garrett butt-gawk Partridge Family. I can't find a thing on them. Digney Fignus and Guadalcanal Diary also had entries that year. Dog Police was ROBBED, I tells ya. I totally agree! DP were robbed! The basement tapes were voted in by callers - the band that won had their entire community on the phone that night hitting the redial button. hen this video first came out and MTV was cool, a bunch of us single bachelors had this as our theme song. Woof Woof Woof...were they think-in? glad i was born when DA 80s was nearly over. reminds me of fat weird cartoon cop dog "scruff gruff" 'take a bite out of crime' now we just need someone to post the video for "1-800." Oh man, I never forgot this video, I can't believe I got to see it again. I can die happy now. Totally fucked up, but happy. Truly amazing. MTV used to be so ahead of its time. Basement tapes are YouTube Music 24 years before YouTube ever happened. Dog Police forever! Nobody knows who we are! HOLY SHIT, 20 bloody be damned years i've been looking for this video No shit. I saw this way back in the day and used to tell everyone about it and could never find it. This kicks my uncles ass. actually cut (edited) this song and produced the video and hes in it when the dog police are walking in the bar hes the one dancing all crazy on the far left wow cool! I've totally giggled at him a million times. he actually did a lot of stuff back then he was a camera man for the Mikey mouse club and he did all the audio for hustle and flow and he is currently working on black snake moan fortunately the departments he work in don't make him fa-mouse Are you talking about Andy? Yes I know Andy & Linda very well. Tell him "Wags" said hello. No the work that we stagehands do carries no fame or solaces but quite often, at the end of the day, we end up making more than the performers and, ask your uncle, WE ARE GOD. If I don't like you one little turn of a dial can make your audience not like you tee gee. All you Dog Police fans will be pleased to know Andrew Sullivan linked to this. OH MY GOD! I can't believe it! I've been looking for this for years. GOD BLESS YOU! I was starting to think I made this up in my head. Dear god. I suspected that I'd imagined this for years because I saw it as a tyke and when I tried to explain it to people they would do little but blankly stare at me. I've had the chorus of this song running through my head since 1983. me too. ;) that makes 3 of us. That makes 4 of us. These guys are now playing with The Jumpiness Chi Chi's That is the weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life. Just straight up weirdness. For reals Is this supposed to make women feel badly about themselves? Like the theme of this is 'have a poor self-image' I think. Like you're so ugly you should be arrested. I've been looking all over for an mp3 of this song. Can anyone help me out? i have an MP3 of this song give me your Email and i will send it to you it'd LOVE AN mp3 OF THIS TOO....BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS VIDEO FOR OVER 20 YEARS NOW I actually finally roistered YouTube just so I could echo all the sentiments posted...I thought it was a figment of my imagination also. I'm also glad to see some people remember 1-800 also. The singer looked like a babushka with a corncob planted. Fay and lame. Was there another video from the 80's that has people wearing dog faces? I swear I vaguely remember another video (other than dog police) that involved people dressed like dogs singing. If someone knows what I'm talking about, please tell what the song was called. this video actually WON 1st prize in an MTV contest for unsigned bands. they were supposed to get a record contract out of the deal,which they probably did, but were then just told to forget it. At the time, everybody was shocked to see that they had won compared to more serious entries. But it was a people's vote that put it there, so go figure. Try not to take it too seriously. it's more at home on Dr. Memento or something. i saw that once back in the 80's and never thought it'd see that again. thanks for posting! i remember that... so trash so cool!! I never realized how much this sounded like Devo! I remember it. Dog Police, where are you comin' from? Dog Police, Nobody knows who you are! This also played on Night Flight, where I first recorded it. MTV (Mars candy company TV....those that were there will remember the Quincy Jones war against MTV's biggest advertiser, MARS, because they weren't playing enough Michael Jackson and it was ALL downhill from there)sucked only marginally less than it does now (except for Al TV). thanks for the video! The hubby pretty much thought I was retarded for singing about the Dog Police (he had never heard of them)...now he just pretty much thinks I'm retarded. yo solo se qe si no entiendes lo qe dizen esto es una mierda pintxada en un palo seko.  Saluted. I remember watching this on USA's Night Flight - way back in the day. Thanks for posting! It came close to winning MTV's "Basement Tapes" contest, but it didn't win.

[natural--trash]

Tag thing, wanted to do it for some time but now im at my comp and stuff so uh yeah anyways

Rules: once you’ve been tagged you’re supposed to write a post with eighty-two truths and then tag twenty-five people

I was tagged by @fluffyliontae

Name: tsu (just call me that, or susu or smth yknow)

Blood type: A-

Nickname(s): susu, mym

R/s: single

Zodiac Sign: libra

Pronouns: eh whatever, on some days its he > she > they but it can also be a diff order so yeah seriously whatever floats your boat

Favorite TV Shows: W - Two Worlds (same), a Persona 5 anime could be one of them but there’s none

Long or short hair: long

Height: 162cm or so

Do you have a crush on someone: romantic none, aesthetic ones? squishes? hoo boy

What do you like about yourself: my eyes, that cute scar on my hand

Right or left handed: right

List of three favorite colors: too many, i mostly like colour combos, but light blue, black and #540003 i guess

RIGHT NOW

Eating: nothing, i had brownie ritter sport a bit earlier tho

Drinking: water

I’m about to: draw

Listening to: Believer - Imagine Dragons

Kids: 0

Get married: nah

Career: I want money

MOST RECENT

Drink: water

Phone call: i think my uncle??

Song you listened to: before Believer there’s Bonfire on my spotify playlist but rn its Queen by History

HAVE YOU EVER

Dated someone twice: nah

Been cheated on: thats a long story

Kissed someone and regretted it: dont think so

Lost someone special: hmm

Been depressed: yeah

Been drunk and thrown up: never drunk alcohol

Kissed a stranger: nope

Had glasses or contacts: yeah

Had sex on the first date: nope

Broken someone’s heart: not that im aware of it

Turned someone down: kinda??

Cried when someone died: yeah

Fallen for a friend: im aro, that doesnt work

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

Made a new friend: yes

Fallen out of love: no

Laughed until you cried: yes

Met someone who changed you: mhhh dont think so?

Found out who your true friends were: kinda (I’m sorry that I’m always answering like this omg)

Found out someone was talking about you: cant remember

Kissed someone on your fb list: i dont use fb

WHICH IS BETTER

Lips or eyes: eyes

Hugs or kisses: hugs

Shorter or taller: taller

Romantic or spontaneous: platonic

Sensitive or loud: sensitive

Hookup or relationship: friendship

Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

FIRST

Best friend: have conatct with both or them but we’re not as close? although I still don’t mind lying/rolling around on his floor

Surgery: does removing my wisdom teeth count? (does it?)

Sport: swimming (I wish I hadn’t stopped)

Vacation: Turkey

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

Yourself: depends on the day (same)

Miracles: yeah

Love at first sight: i dont rly believe in romantic love, but other than that yeah has flashbacks to when x impulse bought a ps vita

Heaven: i want to

EXTRAS

How many people from your fb list do you know irl: i still dont use fb

Do you have any pets: i used to have a duck

Do you want to change your name: yeah kinda i’d prefer something gender neutral

What did you do for your last birthday: i played video games at home bc i have no friends

What time did you wake up today: idk, fell asleep again

What were you doing last night at midnight: internet

Something you can’t wait for: when i move out

Last time you saw your mom: some minutes ago

What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: how my brain is sometimes

Have you ever talked to a person named tom: yeah, had a classmate with that name

What’s getting on your nerves: loud noises in the morning, often ppl i dont consider as friends

instructions: You can tell a lot about a person by the type of music they listen to. Put your music on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people. No skipping.

(should i do the whole thing?? ok lemme get my phone pls note that i havent gotten the p5 ost yet)

Obtained a Berry! - DP OST

actually there comes some more Nintendo OST

Awake -BTS

Young Forever (unplugged ver) - BTS

crow tit (jpn) - bts

Mein Block - Sido

We don’t talk anymore - Jungkook

a song i do not remember what it was

Faint - Linkin Park

La la La - naughty boy

i think its time to make a new playlist bc i dont listen to some pop songs anymore

so uh yeah the whole thing it is

5 things you’d find in my bag:

tissues, a shit ton

wallet

probably some paper

charger

phone

5 things you’d find in my bedroom:

desk

clothes

stuffed animals

bed

my computer

5 things i always wanted to do in life:

Travelmore

Get a job i love

Own a cat

Get a life I like

Have ppl I’m close with that are not far away

5 things i’m currently into:

video games

persona 5, fire emblem heroes (they deserve their own point)

kpop

art

ummm edgesthetic?

5 things on my to do list:

go to a BTS concert

get a part time job

learn Japanese and perhaps Korean and get better at French

visit all the countries I still want to go to

get better at drawing

5 things people may not know about me:

I would love to study video game development but I’m too scared of what’s after that plus there’s no way I’ll get accepted hahaha

i love min yoongi and his mixtape bc he idk he helped me think that maybe not everything in my life will be shitty later and that maybe I’ll be able to be happy one day

I’m currently in a more down phase

i have problems with my sense of reality

i have a cute scar on my hand

Top 10 BTS Songs Tag:

  House Of Cards (Full Length Edition)

  House Of Cards [OUTRO]

  Good Day

No order from here on

4. I NEED U (Japanese Ver.) 5. FOR YOU 6. 쩔어 (Dope) 7. 등골브레이커 (Spine breaker) 8. 24/7 = Heaven 9. Blood Sweat & Tears 10. Not Today

I have time

10 groups/artists you like besides Kpop/liked before Kpop:

nqrse ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎

Fall Out Boy

Panic! at the Disco

DAOKO ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎

Casper

Die Ärzte

I think that’s it

DAT ADAM

uhh I liked Abingdon Boys School at some point

idk the old Sido songs aint bad?

10 favorite non-kpop songs:

ダイスキ - DAOKO

BANG! - DAOKO

Das Grizzly Lied - Casper

パラサイト(Parasite) - nqrse feat.まふまふ,luz  

ECHO - まふまふ (mafumafu) feat.nqrse

p much any song sung by nqrse im sorry im trash hmu and ill link you some good stuff

Believer - Imagine Dragons

Bonfire - Felix Jaehn, ALMA

Die Vergessenen 1/2 - Casper

omg i totally forgot about OSTs Toberu Mono from The Last Stiry, too much from Persona 5 liek Beneath the Mask, Last Surprise etc

10 favorite movies:

i don’t watch enough :c

10 favorite tv shows, including anime & cartoons:

W - Two Worlds

Acchi Kocchi

Psycho Pass

I’m giving up

10 things you enjoyed before kpop/enjoy besides kpop, that won’t fit in the lists above:

music

art

video games

esp atlus n nintendo games!!

cute soft stuffed animals

flight rising

sarma

collecting cute key charms

collecting cute things in general

dancing

ten tag last movie you watched: i dont know

last song you listened to:  that one song mentioned above by Daoko

last show you watched: I Hear Your Voice

last book you read: Der Vorleser by Bernhard Schlink, don’t read it

last thing you ate: chocolate

if you could be anywhere in the world right now where would you be: Tokyo

when would you time travel to: itll be spontaneous

first thing you would do with lottery money: buy a loft

character you would hang out with for a day: P5 Protagonist

time right now: 23:52

the ‘or’ tag

build a snowman with v OR have a snowball fight with j-hope

get coffee with suga OR get ice cream with suga

go to the cinema with jimin OR the amusement park with jungkook

do a dance cover with j-hope OR sing a duet with jin

kiss rap monster OR cuddle suga

babysit with jimin OR dogsit with v

meet j-hope’s family OR have v meet your family

film a commercial with j-hope OR film a sketch with v

hug jimin OR hold hands with jungkook

go to paris with jin OR go to london with suga (sorry been to paris already)

film a drama with jin OR do a photo shoot with rap monster

attend an award show with rap monster OR wear couple t-shirts at the airport with jungkook

spend a lazy day with suga OR explore a city with j-hope

fall asleep next to jimin OR wake up next to jungkook

make up a silly rap with v OR a silly choreography with jin

have a fun picnic with j-hope OR a fancy date with jin

have jungkook serenade you OR have v sing you to sleep

have a dance party with j-hope OR sing karaoke with suga

go camping with jimin and v OR go to the beach with rap monster and suga

cook with jin AND bake a cake with jimin

have a sleepover with the hyung line OR a birthday party with the maknae line

celebrate halloween with jungkook, suga, v and j-hope OR christmas with rap monster, jimin and j-hope

rules: answer the questions with the first letter of your name, then tag 10 people. If the person who tagged you has the same initial, you must use different answers. you cannot use the same word twice.

What is your name? - Tsu

A four letter word? - text

A boy’s name? - Tom

An occupation? - tailor

Something you wear? - t-shirt

A color? - turquoise

A food? - tomato

Something you find in the bathroom? - toilet

A place? - Tokyo

A reason for being late? - traffic

Something you shout? - yells

A movie title? - something that starts with “the”

Something you drink? - tea

An animal? - turtle

A type of car? - tesla

Title of a song? - Tage wie diese - die toten hosen

I’m,,, maybe later @mama-kisu @metroid-fr (you can do the non kpop stuff) eh whoever wants i guess

[pumpingdiaries]

Pumping - for the working mama

Exclusively pumping is, in my opinion, a worthwhile battle. I was so determined when my son arrived to provide him with breast milk, and although he latched great the day he was born, I just didn’t feel like breastfeeding was right. I loved pumping from the first time I tried it in the hospital. I knew that exclusively pumping was the right decision for baby and I, and almost 4 months in I’m still satisfied with my decision.

I went back to work 7 weeks postpartum. I work at a restaurant with no break room, no pumping area. With my first pump, the Somek single electric breast pump, I could only pump one side at a time. This meant I needed a 20 minute break every 3 hours when I first went back to work. There are two “private” (single) bathrooms in the restaurant, so I used either of those. They are both attached to party rooms, so if a party was going on I would put an “Out of Order” sign on the door upon entering. I found that if I didn’t put that note on the door, I was badgered by constant knocking and customers attempting to open the door. Pumping in public is uncomfortable enough BEFORE people trying to force their way into your “break room”!

Around 3 months post partum I had to upgrade my pump to the Laninosh double pump, which was actually a total lifesaver. It cut my pumping time down to 12 minutes total every 4 hours, and my supply stayed the same. This pump is not rechargeable as my precious one was, so this limited my pumping area to only the downstairs bathroom, which had an outlet for me to plug the pump into. Finding a pump that was pricier, but cut my pumping time in half, made taking breaks at work much more manageable.

I have heard from a lot of moms how worried they are about their supply dropping upon returning to work. Here are some tips to avoid that from happening:

1. Before returning to work, start a pumping schedule. If breastfeeding, pay attention to how often baby is eating during your work hours. For example, if your shift is 9-5, pay attention the week before going back to work 9-5 everyday how often and for hour long baby eats. For exclusively pumping moms, a schedule is a bit easier to make although can be difficult home alone with baby. My work shift on Tuesdays is 5-10, so I make sure to pump at 4 before work. That way I only have to pump once at work, rather than at both 5 and 9 or 6 and 10. Your schedule only needs to work for you, and make sure you’re comfortable with it because your schedule will need to last as long as you’re pumping.

2. Another important part of pumping at work is having somewhere to store the milk! Due to my working at a restaurant, I can put my milk right in the fridge for my entire shift. Once I’m finished pumping, I put the bottle in a brown bag, staple it shut, and write “DO NOT TOUCH” on it. I also know moms who bring a cooler to their office with them. I’ve found that a great alternative to ice packs (if for whatever reason you can’t use one) is to take an empty bottle and fill it with ice or water and freeze, and leave that in the cooler with milk bottles. I’ve also used cold teething toys in an emergency! Remember that room temperature breast milk is only good for 4-6 hours, so if you have your milk at work longer than that you’ll need a cooler or fridge.

3. Do your company research before returning to work. I had to discuss with my boss how often I would be taking breaks and for how long, and we came to an agreement that allows me to keep up my supply and continue to get work done. Check your employee handbook, speak to your HR department, speak to coworkers who may have experience regarding pumping breaks.

4. Storing pump parts is also important. Medala does sell pump wipes (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MQW60O/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_xrjmDbSTCHMAG) but I can’t speak to their use because I haven’t tried them. I pump in a bathroom at work as aforementioned, so I wash out my pump parts in the sink when I’m done and quickly try them with paper towel. You can also rinse out your pump parts and place them in a ziplock bag, and put them in your fridge or cooler until you get home and can properly wash them. This is important because even if you aren’t breastfeeding and are exclusively pumping, baby can still develop thrush if your pump parts are not correctly cleaned and sterilized often.

5. The final tip I’ll give is one I didn’t think was important until I bought my Laninosh pump - have a bag dedicated just to bringing your pump parts out with you. I used to bring them in a plastic bag or try to get them to fit in my work bag - having a pump-specific bag is so much better!! I forgot parts at home way less often, and don’t have to worry about damage occurring to the parts. Of course, if you’ll be storing your parts in the fridge or cooler I suppose this isn’t as important for you, but still not the worst idea! Some mama’s even buy two sets of pumps, one for home and one for work. Do whatever works best for you - believe in your pumping journey and make it work!

[evaserrate]

Day 1 - Post 1: An Accounting

I’ve been sitting on this Tumblr for a while now, and finally figured this would be the best place to put my progress on my work! I know myself well enough to say this won’t be updated daily, and there’s a very strong chance I’ll absolutely forget about this platform for months at a time, but I will try my best. 

Let’s see, currently I am working on a few projects, though I’ve picked one to really focus on (Project Working Title Pending XD). Here’s where I am on my current  

Project RtD - 429 words total, with solid character builds and a general plot outline that could use some filling out. It’s a retelling that I’m feeling good about the middle and ending, but the beginning doesn’t feel right. Normally I’d power through, but it really impacts the rest so... doing smaller scenes until I’m happy with the direction I choose to take it. YA contemporary romance. 

Project TUB - 1,326 words total, an original YA fantasy (non-retelling). I’ve been poking around this one for a while and am much happier with my reworked vague-line. 

Project DP -  1,676 words total, solid character builds and general plot outline. Also a retelling, where I’m much more confident in the beginning, so that’s handy. YA Sci-Fi. 

Project BH - 7,855 words. Adult urban fantasy. I love my characters, I love the city, I love where I started to go with the plot, but I got a bit burned out on the genre and need a break. In good news, I forgot I’d printed some pages to edit and left them at my mom’s house. She doesn’t care for fantasy and liked it, so, I think that’s basically a Hugo nomination waiting to happen. 

Project TtGoLt50CaD - 562 words, adult sci-fi. I love this premise so much, and my characters, and need to work on the outline. I’m not a strict outline-over-pantsing person, but I like to have the idea of major events and those are still in the oven. 

I’m writing mostly in either the Scrivener desktop version or in the app. I also have a notebook I drag around everywhere and forget to write in (see app above), and about 7 notebooks with a bunch of notes that I constantly misplace. Thank you to the B&N bargain section for the reasonably priced sets of journals!

Alright, that’s enough for now - we can only hope progress is made and I have a reason to update soon.